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This post is all about the importance of physical touch in relationships.
Do you feel a lack of connection with your partner when you haven’t had any physical contact with them? Because same here! The importance of physical touch in relationships should not be overlooked! When I say physical touch in relationships, I’m not talking about sexual touch. Yes, sex is an important aspect of some people’s relationships but so is just general non-sexual physical contact (which is what we are going to focus on). You know, the likes of hand-holding, kissing, hugging, cuddling, etc.
In this post, we will go through some reasons why physical touch in relationships is so important. Consider this your reminder to start prioritising physical touch in your relationship!
Why is Physical Touch Important in a Relationship?
From the moment you entered this world, physical touch has been used as a signal to communicate to you that you are loved and that you are safe. It helps foster an emotional connection to those who care about you. The same goes for your relationship. Physical touch helps create that felt experience that generates an emotional connection. Not only that, it also plays a significant role in fostering psychological, and physical well-being.
Let’s explore some more reasons why physical touch is important in relationships:
It creates a sense of bonding, connection and trust
Do you feel emotionally connected to your partner when you’re in physical contact with them? Physical touch, such as holding hands, hugging, or cuddling, helps create a deeper emotional connection between partners. It fosters a sense of intimacy and closeness that words alone cannot always convey.
6. **Enhanced Trust:** Touch can build and reinforce trust in a relationship. When partners feel safe and secure in each other’s presence, they are more likely to trust one another both emotionally and physically.
It helps you communicate your love and affection towards each other
Love does not need to be communicated through words alone. A gentle kiss on the forehead. Your partner running their fingers through your hair while you’re curled up with them on the couch. A warm embrace when you walk through the door at the end of a long day. These are just a few ways you and your partner might silently communicate your love for each other. Touch can be an absolutely powerful way for you to express love, affection, and appreciation for each other. There is something beautiful about the silent, intimate messages of care and warmth that get passed between two people through even the simplest of hugs, or the gentlest of touches.
It helps reduce your stress
Feeling stressed? Sounds like you’re in need of a hug from your S.O.
When you and your partner engage in physical touch, it triggers a hormone called oxytocin (aka the “love hormone”) to be released. Oxytocin helps reduce stress and anxiety while promoting feelings of relaxation and well-being. A study done by Holt-Lunstad et al. looking at the effects of “warm touch”, showed an increased salivary oxytocin levels in the married couples who underwent the “warm touch” intervention. They also reported for the males, a significant decrease in blood pressure.
Physical touch also reduces stress by managing a hormone called cortisol (the one you can blame for your stress response). How good does it feel when you arrive home after a long, stressful day at work and you can just melt into your partner’s embrace? You can practically feel some of that work stress fizzle away. Well, this study by Ditzen et al., showed that physical intimacy acted as a buffer for work-related stress and reduced cortisol levels. The moral of the story: If you’ve had a stressful day at work, definitely be sure to have a hug ready and waiting for you when you get home.
It can improve your mood and help you regulate your emotions
Physical touch acts like the key and Physical touch has been shown to stimulate the release of endorphins.
, which are natural mood boosters. It can help combat feelings of sadness or depression. In some couples, physical touch can also be associated with a greater positive affect (Debrot et al., 2013). Positive affect is all your positive emotions like joy, happiness, and enthusiasm.
Physical touch can also help you regulate emotions and keep you and your partner’s emotions in sync. When one of you is upset or distressed, the calming effects of a comforting touch can help calm your worries and provide emotional support. For example, having your partner there to hold your hand when you are feeling scared or to give your hand that squeeze when you are feeling nervous, can make you feel more confident and less alone.
It increases intimacy, desire and satisfaction in the relationship
Physical touch is a critical component of sexual intimacy. It fosters desire, arousal, and a sense of connection between partners. Sexual touch is an expression of vulnerability and trust.
https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/02654075221077280
It’s a powerful form of nonverbal communication
Communication is essential in relationships!
Physical touch is a powerful form of communication in relationships- it goes beyond the need for words! It harnesses the power of nonverbal communication to silently convey information to your partner. For example, a reassuring pat on the back or a gentle hand on the shoulder can convey empathy and understanding. This is great because, at times, it might even be able to help you communicate your emotions more effectively than your words. Or, it might even replace the need to use words at all! In some situations, silence and a sympathetic touch might be all that is needed to communicate with your partner.
Physical touch can also reassure your partner that you are present and committed to them. A simple touch has the power to remind them that you are there for them, both physically and emotionally.
It provides connection during a conflict
The importance of physical touch in relationships also lies in its ability to connect you to your partner during times of conflict. When you and your partner have an argument or disagreement, physical touch helps to build a bridge toward emotional reconciliation. If you maintain some form of physical touch during your argument it can silently tell your partner that: “I know we are in a disagreement and I may not be happy with you right now, but I do still love and care about you.” This can in some cases help keep the disagreement from escalating too much.
Engaging in physical touch (like a hug) after an argument or disagreement has occurred can be a way to signal a want to resolve the conflict and restore harmony. Additionally, it has been found that having some form of touch before or during an argument can allow for more constructive behaviours within the argument, reduces the use of destructive behaviours and reduces the impact of stress (Jakubiak, B. K., & Feeney, B. C., 2019).
It does wonders for your overall well-being
If you haven’t gathered this already from reading all the previous points, physical touch can do wonders for your mental health. With all the physical touch benefits like creating a sense of connection, de-stress, regulating your moods, and reducing the impact of conflict- it’s no surprise really. Engaging in regular physical touch with your partner has been associated with improved life satisfaction and overall well-being (Jakubiak, 2022). The emotional support, stress reduction, and sense of belonging and connection it provides can contribute to a healthier, happier life.
It’s important to note that the significance and types of physical touch can vary from person to person and relationship to relationship. What is comfortable and meaningful in one relationship may differ in another. It’s crucial to communicate openly with your partner about your preferences and boundaries regarding physical touch to ensure that it enhances your relationship rather than causing discomfort or misunderstandings.
