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Hello there, long distance lovers! Have you ever found yourself googling ‘how to kiss your partner through the screen’ or wondered how the spark is kept alive from afar? Well, you’re sure in good company. In this blog post, we’re going to dive into the challenges you may face in a LDR (long distance relationship) and how you can best deal with them. There is no exact blueprint to strengthening your relationship from a distance, however these long distance relationship dos and don’ts will be of great help in developing your connection!
Let’s face it, maintaining a romance that relies on messaging, video calls and the exchanging of selfies isn’t a walk in the park. It’s difficult when you can’t be face to face holding each other, but there are ways of bridging that gap. With some determination and a lot of love you can create a sense of togetherness. We are here to have your back in this journey! By sharing the dos and don’ts that can make or break your romance, we’ll have you feeling confident in your relationship from miles away.
Long Distance Relationships & The Challenges
The dynamics of a romance change significantly when a lengthy distance is in play. Whether it is due to finding love before a city-moving career change, meeting your SO through the online world, or simply being apart for a month’s time, long distance relationships will test you!
Long distance relationships can certainly have their challenges. They’re like trying to fold your bed’s fitted sheets – tricky, veeery frustrating at times, but not impossible! Just don’t give up on your relationship like I give up half way through folding that stupid sheet! 😂 From the heartache of missing each other’s little quirks to battling the difference in time zones, long distance love will throw you a unique set of challenges.
Here are 3 of the most common challenges you will face during a LDR:
- Communication breakdown: Maintaining effective communication can be difficult even without the distance! Adding time zone differences, hectic schedules, and internet issues on top of the usual difficulties has a massive impact on how well you can communicate. Misunderstandings have a higher chance of occurring when you can’t chat face-to-face, and it’s essential to find a routine for calling that works for both partners.
- Loneliness and missing each other: It is normal for the physical absence of your partner to leave you feeling lonely and flat. Special occasions, holidays, or everyday activities can feel incomplete when you aren’t able to share them with your loved one. Missing your partner may be the biggest challenge of all.
- Uncertainty about the future: Being in a long distance relationship often raises questions about the future. It can be challenging to plan for the long term when you’re unsure about when or if you’ll be able to close the distance. It is very important that you both communicate what your plans are so that one person is not left wondering. This uncertainty can create stress and anxiety in the relationship.
Despite the difficulties you’ll come up against, there is a silver lining. It’s an opportunity for personal growth, a lesson in trust, and a test of just how far your love can stretch.
Here Are the 12 Long Distance Relationship Dos and Don’ts
The Dos
Embrace technology
In the circumstances of a LDR, you’d be silly not to make use of modern tech! With the ease of video calling, messaging apps, and social media, staying connected is not nearly as difficult as it would have been in the past. Technology is what will help bridge the gap. It connects your heart to your partner’s even when separated by miles. Isn’t it comforting knowing that you’re only a few taps away from seeing their face and hearing their voice? Capitilise on the use of apps like Snapchat and Instagram to share what’s going on with you and to keep up with your partner’s busy life! Through messaging and photo-sharing, you’ll be able to maintain that emotional connection. Consider your smartphone as your most powerful tool, and don’t hesitate to hit that call button!
Set clear expectations
Setting expectations is essential when you are in a LDR. Think of establishing clear expectations in a long distance relationship as the roadmap to navigating confusing or difficult situations. Knowing what to expect in terms of communication frequency, future plans, and how you’ll handle challenges helps you and your partner stay on the same page. It avoids confusion, reduces unnecessary stress, and you’ll both feel more secure in the relationship. Once you’ve established expectations between the two of you, it’s far easier to navigate the twists and turns that the long distance dynamic will throw at you. So, open up that conversation and draw those relationship guidelines. It’ll keep that love connection strong and steady.
Trust each other
Trust is the foundation of any successful relationship! In fact, for long distance love, there should be even more emphasis on trust. You’re separated by miles, but having faith in each other keeps you both feeling confident and secure. Without trust, doubts and insecurities can creep in and create unnecessary drama – neither of you want that. When you have trust, it is a safety net ensuring that you both believe in each other’s loyalty and commitment (two other very important aspects of a romance). Trust your partner and let your love story unfold with confidence, no matter the distance! It’s the glue that keeps you connected, even when you’re far apart.
Stay positive
Positivity is the sunshine in your relationship! Staying positive in a long distance romance is what will keep it light, fun and full of love. Sure, you might miss each other like crazy, but dwelling on the gloomy side of things won’t help. This doesn’t mean you should be avoiding touchy topics in conversations or neglecting negative feelings, it’s simply about looking on the bright side! By staying positive, you maintain an uplifting and vibrant atmosphere. It’s about focusing on the excitement of future reunions, celebrating the small moments, and supporting each other’s individual growth. A positive attitude turns challenges into opportunities, and it keeps the spark alive even when you’re miles apart! It does sound terribly cliché, but embrace that glass-half-full mentality! Your relationship will thrive!
Plan visits
Planning visits to see your loved one while a long distance relationship is what will keep you excited! You’re constantly counting down, eager to hop in that plane, bus or car to see your partner without the barrier of a screen. These face-to-face moments are not just about having a fun time, they’re essential for keeping your connection strong. They’re your chance to create real-life memories, share unforgettable experiences, and nurture your relationship. Go grab that calendar, mark those dates, and get ready to make the most of your precious time together. Visits will inject a dose of reality into the otherwise internet-based relationship and remind you why the distance is worth it! In the meantime, you can fill the gaps of your days with daydreaming and anticipation.
Surprise gestures
Being spontaneous and throwing surprise gestures in the mix for a long distance relationship adds the gasoline to your romantic spark! Sure, you’ve got the scheduled phone calls and planned visits, but an element of surprise keeps it that much more exciting. It could be a heartfelt letter, an out of the blue video call, or even a surprise online date night (think creative background settings and a cocktail in hand). These little acts of spontaneity show your partner that you’re thinking of them when they least expect it, and it keeps the romance fresh! In the world of long distance love, surprise is your secret weapon to melt your partner’s heart and keep those butterflies fluttering.
The Don’ts
Avoid dealing with jealousy
Jealousy and envy are destructive to a relationship. Sometimes you can’t help but feel those feelings, but it’s how you respond to them that’ll impact your long distance relationship. While it’s natural to feel jealous from time to time, letting it build up is like shaking a soda bottle and waiting for it to explode. It can lead to misunderstandings, unnecessary arguments and trust issues. It’s vital that you trust your partner and address any concerns through open communication. In long distance relationships it is 100% essential to talk about your feelings. So, let your partner know if you’re ever overwhelmed with jealousy. A healthy dose of trust and understanding is the best antidote to jealousy, ensuring that your relationship stays drama-free and full of love.
Overdependence
Overdependence in a long distance relationship is like putting all your eggs in one emotional basket, and if that basket gets a little wobbly, things can get messy. While it’s fantastic to rely on your partner for support and love, being overly dependent can put an immense strain on the both of you. In romantic relationships, it’s essential to maintain your individual lives, interests, and friendships. It allows the relationship to complement your well-rounded selves, rather than being your sole source of happiness. A bit of space is healthy – it can make your connection even stronger and foster personal growth. When loving from a distance, that need for space is the same. Try not suffocate each other with a constant flooding of texts, and allow some breathing space. Remember, you’re two unique individuals in love, not a codependent duo.
Neglect time zones
Neglecting time zone differences in a long distance relationship is detrimental to the communication and connection between you and SO. Ignoring the fact that your partner is hours ahead or behind you in the day can lead to a lot of frustration and missed opportunities to connect. Those pesky time zones might make scheduling a call feel like solving a Sudoku puzzle, but it’s crucial to be mindful of them. Keep track of the time difference and plan your interactions accordingly. When you both respect each other’s schedules and are mindful of the different hours you’re operating in, you can ensure that your conversations happen at the right moments, keeping the spark alive without disrupting your partner’s daily routine. Some sleep will be sacrificed, but this challenge of your LDR is all worth it!
Unrealistic expectations
Constant calling and fortnightly 10,000 mile trips sounds reasonable, right? Uhmmm, probably not! Setting unrealistic expectations in a long distance relationship is only prepping you for disappointment. While it’s fun to dream big, expecting constant perfection or being glued to the screen 24/7 is simply not sustainable. It can lead to you feeling unnecessary stress and tension. Instead, keep it real and embrace the imperfections of life and love. Understand that both you and your partner have other commitments, and there will be ups and downs. Flexibility and patience are two key factors in making a long distance relationship work, and they’ll ensure that your love story stays on track, as if there was no distance separating you.
Ignoring red flags
If you notice significant issues or red flags in your relationship, address them instead of ignoring or avoiding the problem. Otherwise, it’s a recipe for trouble. While love can make us see the best in our partner, it’s crucial not to turn a blind eye to any warning signs. Address concerns, doubts, or issues head-on through open and honest communication. Whether it’s changes in your partner’s behaviour or unexplained inconsistencies, red flags are there for a reason. Trust your instincts, and when you spot something that’s not quite right, talk it out. Ignoring problems in a LDR can lead to bigger issues down the road, so keep those communication channels wide open and ensure your relationship stays as healthy as possible.
Lack of future plans
A lack of future plans in a long distance relationship can make it really difficult for you to feel secure. While spontaneity has its charm, having a shared vision of the future is crucial. Without it, you risk feeling like you’re stuck in relationship limbo. Having conversations about things like your career ambitions and new places you want to visit are great to keep you both on the same page. So, take the time to discuss your long-term goals and how you envision eventually being together. Creating a plan, even if it’s a flexible one, can provide you and your sweetheart with a sense of security, purpose and direction. Settling on future plans will make your LDR journey that extra bit more reassuring.
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Remember that every long distance relationship is unique, and what works for one couple might not work for your relationship. Adapt these dos and don’ts to fit your specific situation. Prioritise transparent communication and be flexible in making your relationship thrive despite the miles that separate you. Love knows no bounds, but it certainly knows how to test them!