Please note this post may contain affiliate links. If a purchase is made through these links, we may earn a commission, at no extra cost to you.

Are you looking for a way to get to know your partner better? To truly understand who they are as a person? Well, look no further! These are some good questions for couples that you can use to deepen your relationship with your significant other.

Humans are complex! Even if you have been with your partner for many years, there is always something more to learn about them. Through these questions you will be able to explore topics that allow you to truly know who your partner is as a person, understand what they want out of life and gauge how they are feeling in your relationship.

This post is all about good questions for couples!

The Best Questions For Couples:

Understand your partner’s past

They say we are the product of both nature and nurture. Understanding what has lead your partner to where they are today can give you some incredible insight into who they are as a person and why they are the way they are. It can also give you more understanding of their quirks and why they may act in a certain way. Additionally, sharing intimate details of your past with your partner builds a sense of trust and deepens your connection. So don’t be afraid to take a step back in time with them.

Good questions for couples to deep dive into each other’s past:

• • What hobbies did you have as a child? Do you still do any of them? Do you want to start any of them again?

• • How does your family express their love? Do you think this has impacted you in any way?

• • What has been the lowest moment of your life? How did you overcome it?

• • What is your proudest moment so far in life?

• • What is your favourite memory from your childhood?

• • Tell me about your childhood. Could you describe what it looked like for me?

• • If you could change one thing about your childhood, what would it be and why?

• • What is the hardest lesson that you have had to learn so far?

• • Tell me about your first crush, what made you have a crush on them?

• • What did you learn about yourself from your past relationships?

• • What five events have impacted your life the most?

• • When you were a child, what did you want to grow up to be?

• • If you could go back and change one thing in your past, what would it be?

• • Who was your childhood best friend? Tell me about them… Are you still friends now?

• • What were your friendships like growing up?

• • If you could go back in time and tell your younger self one thing, what would it be?

• • In what way has your past shaped your values?

Look to the future

It’s definitely nice to be able to daydream about a life together with your partner… It’s equally nice to know for sure that both of you are wanting your futures to head in the same direction. Take the time to get to know what your partner wants out of life! That way you both know whether you are daydreaming about the same things or whether there will be compromises to be made down the road.

Here are some good questions for couples that want to dream of the future:

• • What does the perfect life look like to you?

• • How do you plan to achieve the life that you desire? What steps will you take in order to get there?

• • What is something you would like to achieve together this year?

• • What goals are you working towards right now? Is there anything that I can do to support you?

• • What do you want to be remembered for in life?

• • What do you imagine your life looking like in 5 years?

• • Do you want kids in the future or do you want more kids in the future?

• • At what age would you ideally want to retire?

• • Do you envision us travelling at all together? Tell me about your travel plans for the future…

• • Do you want to buy a house together? What kind of house do you see us living in?

• • When do you see us moving in together? or Do you see this house as our forever home?

• • Are you happy with your career path? Do you foresee any career changes in your future?

• • Do you envision us settling down together? If so, where?

Understand their values

It is a wonderful thing to know what makes your partner tick, and to understand what drives them to live the life that they do. It is also important to learn because it can be a source of tension for couples or it can be a strengthening factor in the relationship. Plus it is just nice to know whether your partner has similar values to yourself because it may mean you will want to lead similar lifestyles.

Here are some good questions for couples that want to explore each other’s values:

• • What is your opinion on lying?

• • What is one thing that frustrates you most in life?

• • What is one thing you want to focus on improving about yourself?

• • Is there a particular value that you are focusing on developing this year?

• • Do you value spirituality/religion? Tell me your feelings about this topic…

• • How did your family and your childhood influence your values?

• • What are three things you couldn’t live without?

• • What do you love most about your life right now?

• • Under what circumstances would you break your values?

• • What is most important to you in life?

• • How would you fill your day if you didn’t have to work?

• • Which is more important to you, your time or your freedom? Why?

• • What are you most grateful for in life?

• • What motivates you to get out of bed every morning?

• • If someone offered you $1,000 or the chance to double it and give it to someone else? What would you do?

• • What is more important to you, adventure or stability?

• • How does success look in your life? What does success mean to you?

• • What is your biggest day-to-day challenge?

• • Is it more important to have, money or connections?

• • What is one value you never hope to break in life?

• • Is it more important to you in all circumstances to live by your values or to do the right thing?

Understand their thoughts about money

Money… we work for it, spend it and always dream of getting more of it! One thing that is super beneficial to learn as a couple is how each of you think about money; your spending, your saving habits, and how you value money. Having an open conversation about money allows you to gauge how you may manage your finances as a couple and discuss any foreseeable compromise and financial challenges you may experience.

Good questions for couples who want to talk about finances:

• • What is something you would like us to save toward over the next year?

• • Where do you see us financially in 5 years time? 10 years time? 20 years time?

• • Are you happy with how we split our money currently?

• • How did you learn about managing money?

• • Do you think that money is inherently good or bad?

• • How do you deal with large financial decisions?

• • Are you an impulsive spender?

• • What is your opinion on having an emergency savings fund?

• • What does money mean to you?

• • Is there anything you think we should adjust in our current budget?

• • What do you enjoy spending your money on?

• • How would you spend one million dollars?

• • What are your thoughts on investment? Is there anything you have considered investing in?

• • What is your greatest financial regret?

• • How do you like to balance saving for the future and enjoying your money now?

• • What is your opinion on saving for retirement?

• • What is your opinion on having insurance?

• • Is saving money important to you?

• • Do you have any financial dreams for us?

• • How do you like to save/spend your income?

• • What is your opinion on debt? Is it good or bad to be in debt? How does it make you feel?

• • How do you manage your debt?

• • What do you think about us having our own individual spending money?

• • Do you currently have any financial goals?

Put a spotlight on your relationship

It’s time to assess your relationship. It is a very healthy thing for couples to take a moment to assess how their relationship is going. It enables you to reinforce what is going well and highlight anything that may need to be improved moving forward. It also allows you the chance to check in with your partner and see how they are feeling and for either of you to address any problems you would like to talk through. So go on, turn on that spotlight!

Good questions for couples wanting to check in with their relationship:

• • What have I done recently that has made you feel valued?

• • Is there anything that has bothered you that you have not yet had a chance to talk to me about?

• • How supported have I made you feel in the last month? Is there anything I can do to improve this?

• • How connected to me do you currently feel? What makes you feel connected to me?

• • Do you feel properly listened to when talking to me?

• • Has there been anything that I have done recently that has made you feel unappreciated/undervalued?

• • Are you satisfied with how intimate we have been over the past month?

• • Do you feel like I have helped share the workload around the house?

• • How do you feel our communication has been lately? What do you think needs improvement?

• • What have I done recently that has made you feel secure?

• • Do you feel like we have spent enough quality time together recently?

• • How would you rate the physical connection we have shared over the past few weeks?

• • What have I done that has made you happy this week?

• • What words would use to describe how you are feeling about our relationship right now?

• • If there is one thing that we could focus on more as a couple, what would it be?

“Understanding is what makes relationships”

– imam ali –

This post has been all about good questions for couples. These questions have allowed you to explore many topics and get to know your partner even better.